Like the boy, 15, who recently invented a simple, cheap test for pancreatic cancer…
…Another boy, 5 1/2, invents a simple, cheap test for qualification to run for president.
Little Dennis Mitchell, 5 1/2, of Dayton Ohio calls it his “un-funny vetting” process:
“See, a candidate for president shouldn’t be laughable. That’s ‘the first big test.’ So first, you look at his birth certificate. If you don’t laugh, you take a look at his mom and dad. If you don’t laugh, you move on to the transcripts of his grades. If you do laugh, you look to see how he got into and out of college with these grades. If you don’t laugh, you move on to his writings as a student. If you don’t laugh, you look to see who his preacher was the past 20 years. If you don’t laugh, you look to see his personal relationships over the years. If you don’t laugh, you look to see the records of his wife’s education and employment. If you don’t laugh you look at his record in prior office and how he managed to get elected over and over again by the same slim margin. If you don’t laugh, you read his writings as an adult. (If you don’t laugh then you probably believe he wrote them himself.) Then you take a look at the statements he’s made in public for the past few years. If you don’t laugh, you take a look at the people he has associated with, including terrorists, communists, Maoists, black separatists, race-baiters and stuff like that. If you don’t laugh, then maybe he’s okay and he passes the first big test. But all this is a lot of work for one person to do. So I have another invention: I call it the ‘news media.’”
“Well, that’s my ‘first big test’ invention. I have others I can tell you about, but my Mom says I have to go to bed now.”
-Dennis Mitchell, 5 1/2, boy genius