Obama meets with Solyndra’s CEO


A Fine Report exclusive —




Obama at scandal-plagued Solyndra “green company,” talking with Solyndra’ CEO Chris Gronet:


Obama: “So what’s this thing we’re standing in front of, do?”
Gronet: “It’s a conveyor belt.”
Obama: “Like what’s holding up the pants on this gigantic suit they just made me put on? Whose jacket is this anyways, Chris Christie’s? My wife’s?”
Gronet: “No, no – this belt conveys things.”
Obama: “Does it go left to right, or right to left?”
Gronet: “Good question. I never saw it move.”
Obama: “How come there’s nothing moving?”
Gronet: “What do you mean?”
Obama: “There’s nothing on the conveyor. How come nothing is being moved around?”
Gronet: (laughs) “We don’t ‘move’ anything here because we don’t make anything here! I take that back: we make money. And a lot of it.”
Obama: “So why isn’t there money on the conveyor belt?”
Gronet: (laughs) “Man, you’re as thick as they said you’d be. The money comes from the Treasury department. But we never actually see it here . The money goes straight from the Treasury to the Solyndra bank account, and then some to my private account, and then the rest to your campaign account, where you over-pay ‘campaign consultants’ and funnel money back to the Congress people who voted for ‘green’ funding. We all make out, you see?”
Obama: “When do I get paid?”
Gronet: (laughs) “We got you elected president, didn’t we? You’re getting a paycheck, aren’t you? You’re making millions ‘selling’ books you didn’t write, aren’t you? Your wife is taking tens of million dollars worth of vacations, isn’t she?”
Obama: “Speaking of which: Michelle is complaining she’s not getting paid as First Lady.”
Gronet: “You’ve got to tell that fool to shut-up, or she’ll blow this whole thing. Keep her big trap shut until after the election. Ask her if she’s ever heard the expression, ‘pigs get fed, hogs get slaughtered.’”
Obama: “Okay, okay… Just to be clear: you do not ‘make’ anything here at Solyndra.”
Gronet: “That’s correct: We do not make anything. Except money.”
Obama: “So all those machines behind us are –
Gronet: “ – Props.”
Obama: “What do people think you’re making here?”
Gronet: “Green. (laughs) And man, are we making green – billions of it!”
Obama: “Ohhh!…. You mean money!
Gronet: (laughs) “Hey, maybe you’re not as thick as everyone says you are…”
Obama: “So that’s what Van Jones has been talking about… I was wondering how he was getting by without a day job.”