42% of Americans Obese by 2030? Fat chance. Mere propaganda, with which to control your life:

It’s important to know that most obesity studies show that obesity rates are actually fattening flattening out. But that’s not what control-freaks on the left want you to hear:


“ABC ‘News:’

“42% of Americans Obese by 2030”




 What the headline should have read was:


“The Obama Legacy: Only 2,030 Americans Could Afford to Be Fat by 2042.”



Even Michelle Obama lost weight:


-Glamour and fashion icon Michelle Obama in her first year of eating free at the White House, shown putting the crush on Obamacare Reichfuhrer Katherine Sebelius. (Notice Sebelius’ severely curved right thumb.)



The Professor Weighs In:


‘The Skinny On the Fat Crisis: There Isn’t One.’

 By Professor Allison D. Papalopolopolis.


Hey there! 


“‘Weighs in.’ Hey, that’s funny. You know, this whole obesity thing is a bunch of blubber. A bunch of beefy, blimpy, bulging, bulky, burly, butterball, corpulent, distended, dumpy, elephantine, gargantuan, gross, heavyset, husky, inflated, jelly-belly, oversize, plumpish, ponderous, porcine, potbellied, pudgy, roly-poly, rotund, swollen, weighty, whalelike bunch of baloney! (I dare you to say that five times fast.) I’ve been around academia long enough to know these guys can skew a study any way they want. I mean look at what they did with global warming, and the fraud that’s turned out to be. And some of my peers were crazy enough to claim it was caused by racism! (How did they ever come up with that??) But what really fascinates me is the curve on Katherine Sebelius’ thumb (not that anything else about her interests me, though we really need to keep an eye on her — she’s crazy.). Do you know that a curved thumb is a recessive inherited trait? Interestingly, an inherited trait is outwardly obvious only when two copies of the gene for that trait are present—as opposed to a dominant trait where one copy of the gene for the dominant trait is sufficient to display the trait. As we in the field say, the condition is masked by the presence of the dominant gene when both are present; that is, the recessive condition is seen only in the absence of the dominant gene.  Just as interestedly, so is a condition called cutis laxa, which is a connective tissue disorder where the skin lacks elasticity and hangs in loose folds. (Attention all you guys: you can’t come up with a better pick-up line than that. And in case you don’t know, ‘No Cutis Laxa Here, Baby’ is my handle on Match.com.) Until next time!”




I know what you’re thinking: ‘She had to have found that purple sticky-note.’ Well, sorry to say I haven’t.  And if Obama is re-elected, I won’t be able to move to Canada without it. So if you see it, please let me know!”


Professor Papalopolopolis’ C.V.:





Cutis laxa: